Candour Communication Podcast

Cheri Torres and Jackie Stavros on using Appreciative Inquiry to create conversations worth having (#41)

Episode Summary

We are constantly in conversation, either with others or with ourselves. In this episode we talk to Cheri Torres and Jackie Stavros about how to use principles from Appreciative Inquiry to make our conversations worth having.

Episode Notes

2:28 - how Cheri and Jackie first came across the idea of Appreciative Inquiry.

4:04 - how many hours in a day are you in conversation?

4:32 - what is appreciative inquiry.

5:34 - difference between a good and a bad conversation.

7:18 - you can feel when you are in a destructive, depreciative conversation.

7:42 - how many of our conversations can be worth having?

9:42 - our words affect each other.

11:13 - what to do when the conversation is turning sour.

12:02 - our conversations with loved ones are often less intentional than with strangers.

12:41 - example of using Appreciative Inquiry in the real world.

14:14 - Appreciative Inquiry is not about having rose-coloured glasses.

15:22 - the technique of flipping.

16:52 - how Appreciative Inquiry has impacted Cheri and Jackie's life.

17:15 - our words matter immensely because they shape our world.

19:08 - conversations worth having at home.

20:57 - how to get your children to actually talk to you.

24:26 - the constructionist principle.

26:32 - the poetic principle.

29:01 - Are appreciative conversations something we're born with or can it be learned?

31:01 - there is a place for the sceptic.

31:40 - appreciative inquiry doesn't mean you ignore problems.

31:54 - analytical approach: looking for positive deviants.

33:17 - overcoming negativity bias.

36:15 - how to manage your emotions in the moment.

37:47 - asking generative questions.

42:11 - dealing with negative people who don't want to have constructive conversations.

44:45 - a conversation worth having is not just a positive conversation.

45:23 - don't assume people don't want to talk to you just because they are shy or introverted.

47:30 - example of how leaders can use appreciative inquiry.

51:55 - why appreciative inquiry is more likely to influence and create change.

54:21 - How Jackie used appreciative inquiry in the hardest conversation of her life.

1:01:03 - connect with Jackie and Cheri.

You can find more detailed show notes with links to references at: https://candourpodcast.com/cheri-torres-and-jackie-stavros